September 23rd, 2008
fallen into the abyss again
yeah, life is a wheel, a circle, a cycle. i was happy for a few months, maybe. But now, i'm miserable again. i really can't stay happy for a long time, can i? the thing is i don't think i deserve this feeling.
i guess you already know Spook. well, he was the reason that i was happy. i had hoped and wished that i already found "the One". I even pictured myself already in a house wth a lawn with my kids and Spook. Then all of sudden, the wheel turned. Spook is the reason I'm depressed. Ironic, huh? maybe I'm met to be alone and miserable my whole life? maybe he's not yet "the One"? a lot of maybes. All I'm sure of is that i'm pretty hurt. If words can only express the pain inside, i would have had wrote it here a thousand times.